The wild child

01/09/2015  A new year, another birthday. Thank you to everyone who took the time to wish me a Happy Birthday, I felt the love.

This boring post will have to hold you over until Trace has gone home, he comes this Saturday and leaves the 18th. We are beside ourselves with excitement AND also really excited for Highway to see him. Highway adores Trace. When my ankle got broken Trace walked him and Dooce for me every day when he got home from work. Highway could hear Trace’s car before it even got near our house.. He is going to go ballistic, I just hope he doesn’t have a coronary, he is a little hyper to begin with.

And Lola, holy shit man, this dog is something else. Forget the fact that she is only 8 weeks old, she is one crazy little girl. She has no fear of anything, she does not want held, she runs up and down all of the steps, yesterday I found her sitting on the ROOF. She is bound and determined to do it her way. Trying to hold on to her is like attempting to wrangle a hippopotamus for a suppository. The Queen of Squirm. She is attached to Highway, everywhere he goes, she does. Sometimes she is hanging from his jowls, literally, you can see his skin stretched. I stop her, take her away from him, tell her no and she turns around and jumps right back on him.

This past week has been spent cleaning the downstairs before Trace comes. Well, cleaning and watching a puppy. The puppy is like a full time job and then some, especially when she wakes you at 2:30 AM howling her little head off. This has only happened once since the first night from hell when we brought her home. It was just the other night and we determined that she was hungry. We fed her and she went back to sleep. Now we feed her at 8 PM to lessen the chances that she gets hungry in the middle of the night. She is relentless with poor Highway though, I really do feel sorry for him. His patience is unlimited, I never knew he had it in him. Life certainly has come full circle. He grew up doing these exact same things to Dooce and she very gently took his abuse. Now Dooce is gone and he is in her position, he is the one being bitten and nipped at constantly.

When they do chill, she is always right next to him.

There is the rare occurence when she decides to get close to Lucky and he’s all like, “what is this shit, get it away from me, NOW.”

We went to Chuck and Nancy’s on Sunday afternoon so Bill could look at their washer and attempt to run a test to determine what the problem is but it wouldn’t run the test, back to square 1. While there Nancy made some margaritas. Neither Bill or I had eaten all day and the drinks hit us like a wrecking ball to the middle of the forehead. Holy crap, haven’t been that drunk for a very long time and I will never be that drunk again. I have sworn never to touch tequila for the rest of my time on earth. It’s just plain evil shit. We got home around 6 and had dogs to feed and had to find food for us. Not me, nope, I went to the bedroom, laid down and passed out for 5 hours. I think Bill fed the dogs. I never ate, I was too drunk. I even slept in the clothes I wore to Nancy’s, that’s how freaking pitiful I was.

Both of us felt like tremendous piles of crap on Monday morning and I had a massage scheduled at 10 AM. I made a big breakfast to help expel all the tequila toxins that were swirling deliriously in my Italian blood. I really wanted to crawl back in bed but I drug myself to French Cay and made it to see Susie on time. She gave me one heck of a massage. It hurt like hell and I knew it would. I like pain, I will pay for it. That’s why I had a broken ankle surgically repaired and a knee replacement in 5 short months. Glutton. I have been having neck issues and snorkeling around the cow last Sunday did not help that issue. I was ready for the pain of the massage, each time she said take a deep breath, hold it, let it out slowly, I knew I was in for an ass kicking. Susie is a little thing but holy crap, she gives a massage like a 300# man would. She obviously knows what she is doing and I knew I wouldn’t be better after 1 visit, I mean, she’s not magic. If only she were.

One of the (many) infuriating things about island life is that many times we’ll go to the grocery store and they have NOTHING. Not a decent red or green pepper, no lettuce, the broccoli is so bad I doubt pigs would even eat it. It’s like black rubber, so gross. No jalapenos, no papayas or pineapples, no cheese, no juice, no bread, no ice cream. NO VODKA. WTH???You think I would be used to this after living here but it still pisses me off.  It’s a pain in the ass to keep going back to see if they got their stuff in yet. Usually fresh stuff comes MWF, I was there on a M and a W and nada. All you people living stateside, be greatful your grocery store ALWAYS has the food you want.

We have both been going on the morning dog walks. Before Bill was taking all 3, Lola not on a leash, but she spent so much time snarling and snapping and pulling on the boys leashes he wouldn’t take her anymore. We bought her a camo harness and leash (she’ll probably chew through it soon.) Bill handles the boys and I wrangle the wild one. She nips at their ankles walking down the hill. Several times on the walks Highway has peed on her head. she doesn’t learn.

Junior and Alexi have been working on John’s generator and hanging out here in between working. They were standing in our driveway talking and I suggested they cut down the tree in the middle of the driveway. I mean seriously, with my history of things appearing out of nowhere behind me and being hit by my car because they were in my  car’s way, why would you have a tree in the driveway?

Here in the jungle, we have vultures, lots of them. The other day was a gorgeously windy day and they were riding the thermals in the valley, there were over 12 of them at one time. For some reason they liked perching on this pole and actually had a few fights over who got pole top. Interesting and very ugly birds of prey.

This afternoon we were on the deck in the sun with the dogs when Highway and Luck started their don’t make me come down there and kill you barking. I got up to look and there were 3 guys and a kid coming up the driveway with 3 dogs. Our dogs, Lola included, were in a frenzy. As they walked by the house I noticed the kid was carrying a Watusa or Agouti by the tail, it had its head whacked off. Obviously their dinner. UGH!

I apologize for the sheer boredom of this blog, you can’t have excitement every day of the week, or can you? Well, I guess you can living down here but if you’re trying to get things done at home you miss out on all some of the fun.

Bill just came up from outside, he was scorpion hunting with a black light. They glow if you shine it on them. I bet all of you will be clamoring for your turn to come to Roatan to go on Scorpion hunts with Bill at night.

I’ll be back after the 18th with a new and improved camera for above ground and underwater photos, hopefully I will have lots of fun things to blather on about!

And remember, tequila is evil shit. Stay away.