Rain. Stop already.

12631387_1256154904411317_1964279461614208802_n02/25/2016 It’s pouring here. I mean, like a deluge of rain, our cistern is full and overflowing. As the weather station so aptly comments:

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Nailed it. It rained over 4″ so far this morning.

All dogs are inside, shedding and sleeping. They do both simultaneously, with ease.

I had a quiet week last week, so quiet I don’t remember it.

I had promised Nidia that I would help her count her remaining inventory of TOM’s shoes so she can place her order. The day we were to do it she was sick so I met her son and his girlfriend Abby at the bodega and we counted shoes FOR 2 HOURS. We had to sort them by size, many boxes had random sizes in it, it was a semi nightmare. I came home and made a spreadsheet for Nidia and there were 1759 pairs of shoes left. A mere drop in the bucket of the 15000 we hope to deliver this year.

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it was so hot in this small room, no breeze at all.
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I was a dirty sweaty hot not in a good way mess by the time I left there.

Of course, I did the BJ’s gig on Friday and hung out with my regulars. On Saturday Carmen came here at 11 and we went to the airport. It was Carmen’s first day, indoctrination by fire. We had 4 flights arrive at almost the same time. Mass controlled pandemonium. Carmen enjoyed it and is ready for another Saturday. I was so exhausted by the time I got home that I melted.

Sunday was a day of nothing. I don’t even think I got dressed at all on Sunday until after I showered in the evening and then it was clean sleepwear. Lazy lazy day.

Monday was beach day again. I had friends coming from the west end of the island, they were meeting us at Oak Ridge and following me to Barbon. I picked Carmen and Brett up, got gas, met Lauren and Lori and we were off to the beach.

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Karen and Lauren
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Kite surfing from Camp Bay
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A BB gun for entertainment..it’s all fun and games until somebody shoots their eye out.

We had a small crowd, Roger brought his grill and music, no volleyball that day but we were all in the water for a long time. I had plans on Monday night so we had to leave the beach earlier than normal.

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This is the detail on the new pirate ship nightclub that is being built down the road. It’s a scab on the pristine end of the island as far as I’m concerned.
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Going to cause some accidents due to looky loos..

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In all it’s glory??
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View coming up hill approaching it.

Monday night we went to my friend Milesse’s house for dinner with 3 other couples and my buddy Eduardo, the cop. We had a great time, a fabulous meal and the company was excellent.

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Eduardo and me

We were at Milesse’s until after 11 PM, which is crazy late for us. Normally we aren’t out at night, roads are miserable to drive on during the day, at night they are beyond horrible.

Wednesday I had my cleaning girl come and do all the windows and the window tracks. She dusted, scrubbed the porch, the upstairs and the steps. The house was clean for a few hours, until the dogs came in.

Our friends Sam and Chelsie came for dinner last night. They were going to come at 5 but Sam had to go move 4 boats to a safe harbor due to an approaching storm. They arrived at 7 and left around 10. The sky was still clear when I took the dogs out on the porch but I put one of the rain curtains down in case. When I woke up this morning it was flipping pouring and has been off and on all day long.

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Highway, Max and Lola

This coming week is going to be a real busy one. This is just a quick update, a calm before the storm type of post..

Hasta luego.

Smells like dead lizard

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02/17/2016 Today I went to my local bank to withdraw $$ from the ATM but it was down, AGAIN. So I used the blank check in my wallet to get money out of the account. I made the check out to myself and signed the back of it. It was for Tres Mil, 3000LPS or about $150.00. I handed the teller my Honduran resident card and my debit card for this account. He started filling out paperwork and on the back of my check he wrote my account number. Then he flipped the check over, looked at it, at the back of the check, then at me again and said DEPOSIT? OMG, NO. Why would I deposit a check drawn on my only account into the account it is written on?? This was after waiting 35 minutes..seriously??

I haven’t been in a blogging mood lately, sorry about that. I’m depressed. My house in the US was always clean, windows, floors, curtains, clean. I am physically unable to keep this house on the hill clean no matter what I do. I dust and the next day it looks like I invited the Sahara desert over for a freaking windstorm. I shit you not. You can write your name on any and every piece of my furniture. My window tracks are disgustingly gross, filled with dead critters and mud. I just cleaned them again yesterday and as soon as it rains they will be muddy again. Does it rain dirt on this island? Cleaning my window tracks is an all day job, I have 16 windows on the second floor that open. They are filthy all the time. Add to that a husband who is not Mr. Clean and 5 dogs and a cat and it’s a lose lose situation.

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Before
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I use a screwdriver and small wire brushes and pine sol.
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After, clean until it rains again.

Last week a few nights in a row when I crawled into bed I smelled dead animal. I was convinced there was a dead lizard somewhere under the bed. Bill looked all over for it but didn’t see anything. We pulled the mattress up and looked under it, nada. I opened my nightstand drawer and found a pile of stuff that smelled like dead something. Whatever it was it was disintegrated into a mound of pulp in the drawer. I took the drawer in the bathroom, emptied the contents, scrubbed it out and put it back. Then I went back in the bathroom to clean up the mess and was assaulted by the SAME DAMN SMELL. I finally realized it was the bag of cat treats still setting on the counter that smelled like dead lizard. That’s what the mound of stuff was in the drawer that smelled.

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Seriously, I thought this was a decomposed lizard.
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It was decomposed Temptations…

Last Sunday we had no power due to the rain and winds. So, what do we do when the power is off, go to Mega Paca and shop. Marilyn, Carmen and Carmen’s parents picked me up on their way to town. First thing I scored was a Kate Spade wallet. It was $1.50.

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In love with this

We all had a blast shopping except it was hot in there with no A/C (power was out island wide). We made a few stops before they brought me home. I think power came on later in the day but it was off for a loooong time.

Monday was another beach day. I picked up Carmen and Brett and Karon and Ron (Carmen’s parents) and we drove out to Camp Bay beach. We had a pretty good turnout, we floated, played volleyball and had a few drinks.

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Kathy, Karon, Carmen and Brett
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The second round of volleyball

Then the 5 of us went to La Sirena for rum punches, well I didn’t drink any because I was driving and they are STRONG. I just devoured my onion rings, so yummy!

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Selena’s pig @ La Sirena
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Brett and Ron
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Brett and me

We had an epic Tuesday, really we did. Marilyn, Carmen and Karon picked me up and we went to Coxen Hole to get Nidia. We were on our way to see Doña Maria. I had sheets and a blanket, shampoo and conditioner and 2 bags of coffee for her. Marilyn had a new pillow, more sheets and a roll of chicken wire that a friend of hers donated. After we got Nidia and the chickens that Daine gave us we went to the grocery store where Carmen and Karon bought Doña Maria all kinds of things, cereal, milk, oil, salt, sugar and coca cola. Then we went looking for feed for the chickens (that were in a pillow case in a box in the back of the car), got that at the 2nd store. We then drove around some more looking for a corn grinder for her. Marilyn had gotten one before but turns out it was a meat grinder. After looking several places, we had one more place to look. That was the golden ticket, Nidia found a beautiful grinder there for Doña Maria.

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Nidia with the corn grinder

We headed back to the path that treks through the jungle and started walking up to her house. When we got there we were disappointed because she wasn’t home. Martha Stewart Marilyn, in her pink Polo wellies, started building a chicken coop for the new chickens.

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Marilyn building the coop
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We named them, Marilyn, Carmen, Nidia and Deb.
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The hinges on Doña Maria’s house.
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Her oven, stove and microwave all bundled into one handy energy saving unit.
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There is water in the bucket to wash her dishes with.
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This looked like a chicken coop but we realized she was drying her bananas in here.

Rather than leave and not get to see Doña Maria we decided to hang around until she came home. We wandered around checking things out, waiting for her when all of a sudden she comes walking up the path with a cardboard box balanced on her head. In the box were scraps of wood for her fire that is always burning. She had walked all the way into Coxen Hole carrying a hand of bananas to sell. Doña Maria weighs all of 75# soaking wet and she carried the bananas down the path, walked along the highway into town, they must have weighed 30# at least. She found a buyer for her bananas, the lady took them and then said she didn’t have the $$ to pay her. All of that for nothing, she came home banana-less. Doña Maria was so excited to see us. We made her close her eyes and then Nidia walked her to the chicken coop, she was thrilled that we got her chickens. Nidia showed her the gorgeous corn grinder that Marilyn bought for her, I know it’s something she will really use a lot. We gave her all the things we bought for her, I think it may have been overwhelming. Carmen had a padlock with a key for her door and a variety of food stuff. Doña Maria showed us her sugar cane press that her son made for her.

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This photo has Flat Poppy on the press. I’m doing a Flat Poppy story for my friends granddaughter.
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Doña Maria’s one room home.
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Nidia climbed up the hill where they planted corn and took this pic. There is a chicken coop behind Carmen and I, but the chickens belong to someone else.
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Carmen, me, Karon and Nidia
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Her water bucket wheel barrow. In the back of the wheelbarrow you can see a pile of dirt. The Live Again Ministries went there and dug holes so they could put in a bench for Doña Maria. They came back the following week with the wood and built it for her.
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Bags of treats for Doña Maria
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She didn’t know what to say when she was given the corn grinder. What a difference it will make in her life.
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The entrance to her one room, bed only, home. She does not own a chair.
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Doña Maria, me and Flat Poppy.
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Carmen, Doña Maria and Karon (Carmen’s mother)
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Her entryway and Flat Poppy
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This is where a little 83 year old lady lives alone. She is unable to lock the door from the inside.
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Nidia sharing a glass of coke with Doña Maria.

She wants to get her hair done again so Nidia will follow up on that. After I posted some photos on FB I had a friend here on the island who wants to pay for and build her a table and bench to use as a kitchen table. I’ll probably get her a few plastic chairs too. We are also inquiring about building her a better home. She doesn’t own the land so we have to get permission from the landowner.

After we said our good byes to Doña Maria we dropped Nidia off in Coxen Hole and headed home, sort of. We got diverted and went to Romeo’s in French Harbor for lunch and wine.

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French Harbor
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We were going to sit outside but it was pretty windy and cool so we moved indoors.
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I could eat 10 plates of this bread. I only had 1 slice, I shared.

I don’t recall what I did the next few days, one of them I tried, again, to pay my friends property tax, only to be told this time I needed copies of their RTN’s. They did not say I needed them the last time I tried to pay, each time I go there, it’s something different. You would think that they would make it easy to pay your taxes, especially since so many on the island don’t pay theirs. UGH!

Friday was BJ’s and on the way there, I paid our taxes. The last 2 times I tried to pay them I couldn’t wait any longer because of Spanish class. This time I was in and out in less than 10 minutes. Then I was off to BJ’s with the crew. It was another rainy shitty day but we still had a good group of people.

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The Banditos rocking the place.
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Some of the die-hards coming by boat in the pouring rain.
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This is BJ’s husband Carmen. He likes his rum.
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My favorite Bitchacha who will probably give me hell because I posted this pic!

And the rains continued. When I got up Saturday morning and looked out the windows, first the south shore and then the north shore, I realized I couldn’t see either. We were socked in with no visibility and a very low cloud cover. The tower at the airport is not equipped to do IFR landings so unless the pilots can see the runway (Visual landing as opposed to instrument) they can’t land.

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Seriously, I’ve never seen it like this.

I got to the airport at 11:15 and we were told it was closed. No flights coming in or leaving. Really? We had 2 AA, 2 UAL and a Delta flight coming in and an airport full of stranded delayed passengers. I got the PAX counts and ETA’s from the desks and we waited to see what was going to happen. The first flight was due in at 12:30 but it was “late.” We stood outside the back of the airport facing the runways and watched the Delta and the 1st United circle overhead. Then we heard that the United diverted to San Pedro Sula. Soon after that, out of seemingly nowhere, the Delta plane landed. The runway at RTB is right smack next to the water and we could barely see the water. As the PAX were de-planing and I was welcoming them at the immigration door I saw the American jet come in, almost land and abort at the last minute. OMG, the passengers were probably freaking out. It went to Belize instead. We were told the other American also went to San Pedro Sula. After waiting around the American from San Pedro and the United finally came over from the mainland and landed. The 2nd United flight was cancelled and we heard the American wasn’t coming. I went into the office and signed out and was getting ready to leave when the airport guys said the American that went to Belize was due in at 6 PM (only 5 hours late). I signed back in and 4 of us went to wait for the plane to come in. The runway lights were on, waiting for the flight from BZE @ 6 but at 6:10 PM it was cancelled, still in Belize. As it turns out, there was no room in Belize for the plane so they refueled and took those poor passengers back to Miami and they were bringing them the next day.

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It’s rare that a plane lands at night in Roatan, as it turned out, one didn’t land this night either.

It was an exhausting 7 hour day at the airport, the only good thing I can say about it is, I love meeting the new people coming to the island and I love the ladies I work with.

A few shots of random stuff before I wrap this up and go read.

This is the ARK they are building in Politilly. It is going to be a nightclub??? I’ll snap some more pics on Friday when I go to BJ’s, they have done a lot of work on it. I don’t remember who took this photo but I did not.

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This is my niece Devon, my brother PJ’s daughter. She is at the Night to Shine event at a church in Montoursville, PA. This is an event sponsored by the Tim Tebow foundation and it is worldwide..Devon had a blast at the party, I so wish I could have been a fly on the wall.
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We had a visit from an Amazon Parrot yesterday. It sat up in the trees calling. I looked around for more but didn’t see any. I know, it just looks like a bird but believe me, through the binoculars I could tell it was a parrot.
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Max and Barrio snoozing on Highways bed.
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Gringo and Barrio. I finally took the chairs off the couch, the boys seem to know it’s off limits.
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Dog origami, on the roof.
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Trace took this pic of his sweet girlfriend Maureen. I love it! We are anxiously awaiting for them to come visit us soon. (Hint hint Maureen)
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My friends Jill and Rick Jackson own Las Cabanas de Loreto (a fabulous vacation spot) in Baja, Mexico. Rick, as you can see, is a professional photographer. He snapped this photo while they were camping in Baja on Valentines Day. To see more of Rick’s work go to http://www.soulcatchingimages.com
Yes, we have bananas, lots of apple bananas. The dogs are still enjoying them every morning with peanut butter, I’m eating them and Bill makes a smoothie every night. Sure hope we have some when our guests arrive in March.
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And that my friends is a wrap. I’m off to the couch. If any of you have any hints or tips for my house cleaning woes, I’m ready..
Signed:
Disgusted with the dirt in Paradise

Misfits and Mayhem

pirate202/06/2016 The front of the house is finally fenced in; however  the fence was not yet concreted to the cinder block base and we are still waiting on the metal sliding gate to be finished. Bill made a temporary fence gate to keep the dogs in. The other day the pups were outside running around playing and next thing I hear is Bill yelling, “the pups got out!” They pushed the fence away at the bottom where it wasn’t finished and escaped like greased pigs. Luckily they ran down through the woods and not down towards the main road. Alexi went chasing after them and I ran down the driveway (well, fast walked, I can’t really run) and they were all running back up to me. Highway was the only one who didn’t escape, well, he and Frito, who was inside. Bill finished the fence the next day so they can no longer escape through the bottom. That was a little excitement that I didn’t need, I would freak if anything happened to any of them.

Brett and Carmen rode with me to Mondays Don’t Suck. I’m so glad they came because it was an awesome day on the beach. We had a huge group of people enjoying MDS. The Duchess of Camp Bay’s friend (and my friend) Skip arrived on Saturday and was there for the day along with so many other people, some I didn’t even know. We played volleyball, swam and floated AND we did a conga line on the beach. I think it was going on 5 PM by the time I got home. I was exhausted from all the fun.

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Game 1, Carmen displaying her perfect form. I too played a round of volleyball but, for some damn reason, I couldn’t stand still, I had to dance. There was music playing and it was dancing music..Once I start I have a hard time stopping. Dancing that is, not playing volleyball. While looking at this photo, please imagine that I have the same ultra perfect form that Carmen does. I’m sure I do. Really.
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Cute beach dog who may now belong to the Duchess.
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Carmen displaying her 2 favorite beach things, wine and a Bengals cup..
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Francie showing off her technique..she’s our sexy player..
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So many people and so many different levels of being upright. What a group!
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Skip was really excited for Mondays Don’t Suck!
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Volleyball is hard work..so is partying all the time!
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View of our beach area..
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Roger looking for some good Conga Line music.
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A small gathering of misfits
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The Duchess
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The Duchess and Skip
So many fun people, it was an awesomely amazeballs day.

There are 2 videos of the conga line..I was going to post one of them but then decided that nobody really wants or needs to see my boobs almost popping out of my suit. So, you’re welcome, I saved you from the retina burner. Skip, thanks for the TIME and People magazines w/ Bowie on them. Prized possessions..I still owe you a drink or 3.

Tuesday I went to Mega Paca to get some bedding stuff for Doña Maria. We are planning to go see her on Sunday, weather permitting. I got her a few nice things then went to the store and got her some staples like coffee and shampoo and conditioner. The group from Live Again Ministries are on the island and paid her a visit last week, they are building a bench for her. More on that in the next blog..On the way home from shopping I stopped at the Stihl chain saw place to  get a new wiper and ended up sitting there pulling ticks off their puppies eye and out of her ears. {I bought some worm medicine and stopped the next day to worm her.}

I came home and did some laundry and was sitting here at the computer reading something when I heard a loud rumble. I thought it was a severe wind gust. Then the whole damn house shuddered, TWICE. The dogs freaked out, Barrio cried, and it was over. Earthquake!! At first they said it was 4.7 and upgraded to 4.9. It was so weird to hear the rumble, thinking it’s something else but then realizing just what the hell it was. No injuries or damage reported on the island. I have a big art piece that needs realigned, but that’s it.

I don’t work at the airports on Wednesday, but I was there. I went to meet a new friend who is active in animal rescue and was coming to the island for vacation. She brought along a donation of many collars and leashes for the upcoming vet clinic and I offered to meet her at the airport to get them. Thank you Brenda, I know they will be appreciated! I also got to meet Carmen’s parents who arrived the same day. I spent most of the afternoon Wednesday trying to decide on a costume for the Pirate party. I’m not much for costumes but having gone to the party last year and seeing the way people were dressed, I had to give it a shot. I tried on so many damn black dresses, red bra on top of tank tops (looked like a poor hooker), swimsuit cover-up (fat), skirts, back to dresses, started feeling like a nitwit and thought maybe I should just go to the party and not worry about a costume. I decided to make rum balls and have a drink instead.

Thursday morning I got up and all I could think about was a pirate wench costume. I somehow managed to go from pirate girl to wench overnight, funny how that shit happens. All of a sudden I had an epiphany. My boots, I still  had my boots. Never forget that a good pair of boots can make you into a slutty pirate in no time. These boots took me months to decide on, the boots that I may have bought 9 or 10 different pairs, only to return them all. The boots that I finally had to special order. It became a joke with my friends back in the states, especially Teri B who happened to be with me for many of the search, buy and return scenarios.

I’ll admit it. I used to have a very serious addiction. To black shoes and boots. Truth be told, moving to the island was the only way for me to escape the chains of my addiction and get on with my life. I only brought 2 pair of black boots and probably a dozen pair of black shoes, 10 pair which I have not worn since I’ve been here.

Anyhow, so I have these kick ass black knee-high, heeled boots. They’re not a spike heel so they can go dressy or slutty..I chose the latter. By 10AM I had my outfit chosen and I was feeling pretty good. Only issue was MY FEET. They thought they were dying in properly enclosed shoes, it’s been a few years since they have seen anything like boots. I sucked it up and pulled those suckers on, zipped them up, grabbed a Stronghold headband, my wine and wineglass and we were good to go. Oh yes, I also had on a pirate shirt and my tutu, of course. All slutty pirate wenches wear tutus.

For all of you curious souls, no Bill did not wear a costume, but he did go with me. Alexi, our helper was here and when he saw me he got this big shit eaten grin on his face and said, “you look cool.” I knew I did something right. We got to BJ’s around 10 to noon and were picked up by boat to get to the party. I believe we may have been the first guests to arrive. Francie was already a gorgeous slutty pirate wench but Franklin wasn’t in his Johnny Deppish clothes yet.

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Big Rock (If this looks familiar, it’s is the same place that we had spa day recently)
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flying that flag
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The fabulous slutty pirate hostess with the slutty pirate toenails and me.
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Pirates pirates everywhere..
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Alex and Joe, pirate banditos
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We had parrots everywhere
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The outdoor kitchen/bar area..
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The fabulous host Franklin with their new, adorable puppy, Rocky.
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Francie eating some of the firecrackers I made..
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Roger and Mike
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Skip and the Duchess Jeanie
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2 slutty pirate wenches, Francie and Marilyn
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The sword that Kathy is wearing is real, and it is sharp.
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For some reason I thought it was a good idea for Brett to use the sword to slash up the neck of my t-shirt, while I was wearing it.
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Yep, more piratey shirt for sure.
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The divine pirate wench Kathy.
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Kathy and Carmen
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Keri (from Snohomish WA), BJ and me
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I wore my tutu in the pool and the tag was still on it, $198.00
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Franklin and Bob
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Francie, Gail and I dancing. You can see the water droplets on my skirt. It did very well in the water. I would get out of the pool and shake like a dog and it would be almost dry. Thankfully no pics of the dog like shaking..
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Carmen and I decided to grace everyone with a beautifully choreographed synchronized swimming special. Thank you Davey for capturing these moments on film.
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We are so good, our timing was spot on.
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Keri and Gail, wenching it up. Gail is my dancing girl, she loves to dance as much as I do.
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Photo by Rosalie Dickson Boileau. Rosalie took this photo of her husband Bob (L) me and Joe.

Funny thing, at the semi end of the party they announced the winners for best costume and Bob won for the men and I won for the women. We each got a Pirate shot glass. Francie said I won b/c of my boots, Bob won b/c he had cute red lips..

This was seriously the best party I’ve been to since ever..the food was spectacular, as is the location, superb hosts and an amazing cast of fellow pirate friends..an epic pirate party!

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Rosalie posted this on FB the day after the party. It’s so perfect.

Brenda, who I met at the airport (collars and leashes) on Wed. messaged me Friday morning to see if I was going to BJ’s. I was debating because I didn’t have the energy. I knew that excuse would not cut it with Jeanie so I fed the dogs a late breakfast, showered and dressed for the day. I got to BJ’s a little after 1 and there were only a handful of people there but soon the place began to fill up. Francie and Franklin came so I ran to my car to call Bill to see if he was on his way. He made an enclosed bulletin board for Kat’s Rise Up Roatan center and he was going to help Franklin hang it.

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This is the building where our Spanish classes were held, coincidentally, it’s right across the road from BJ’s parking lot..

I hung out at BJ’s, got involved (sort of) in a meeting with PIER (Partners In Education Roatan) and some friends, then went back to BJs. Brenda and her friends were  there, Jeanie, Roger and Skip had arrived, the place was packed. I got an order of fries, finished my wine and went home. Before I left I told Brenda about Cal’s Cantina. We were going there for dinner with Jeanie, Roger and Skip. We got to Cal’s around 5, a perfect time because there was already a table of friends, more came in, then another table, then Brenda and her friends, then our neighbor John came, before long, the place was crowded. We had a good meal, as always, and then came back here for Skip to meet Frito and we did sips of Damiana.

I woke this morning to a chilly cloudy rainy day. My mind went to the people coming in for vacation, on a dark, damp, cool dismal day. You know most of the people just left somewhere very cold and were hoping to arrive on a bright sunny island. Not happening. I didn’t realize just how bad the weather was until I got to the airport and heard it was closed due to a low ceiling. Avianca going to the mainland sat there, fully boarded for over 90 minutes waiting to take off. AA from Miami was late due to mechanical issues, United arrived first, after circling for 15 minutes. Soon after that 3 more planes landed, (one of which aborted their first landing here and went around again), at the same damn time almost. It was a long day but I did get a guy to sing to me and then he kissed me, all to get in the express lane..Some people will do anything…and I’m just the girl to make them.

TV tip, just watched Twinsters on Netflix, I really enjoyed it. True story about twins separated at birth who find each other 25 years later. Great story and the real twins are the stars..

It’s past my bedtime, stay tuned..I’m hoping we don’t get blown off this hilltop, it’s pretty damn windy out there.

P.S. I was going to post this blog this morning but I woke at 5 AM to no power. It just came back on around 4:30 this afternoon. Island wide outage, always happens when a Norther rolls in..

Eclectic Twist

Design And Live Outside the Lines